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Monday, October 27, 2008

A Mommy Confession

No mommy is perfect. We all do our best and yet there are times we realize we didn't make quite the right decision. And times we don't do the "little things" like warm the baby's bottle or actually get the kids dressed! And times we know we should do something a little differently, but lack the motivation to change.

Today is my mommy confession! I'm sure I have a long list I could come up with but I'm going to keep it to the one thing bugging me right now.

My confession is...I have a slight addiction to "downtime" in the afternoon (on my days off) that involves the computer and the TV. I tend to go, go, go in the morning and when naptime hits...I'm ready for my own break. Being pregnant plays a big role in this too! Several weeks ago I was napping every afternoon I could, but my energy has returned some.

It was perfect when both the girls were taking afternoon naps. I'd get them down, clean up from lunch, maybe do one or two quick chores and then have "me" time. By the they woke up, I was refreshed and ready to turn back on.

But...Miss Rose doesn't take afternoon naps anymore. And she is one of those "screen kids." If the TV is on, she's paying attention to it, whether the show is of interest to her or not. Gracie on the other hand, doesn't care so much for TV and she would rather play with toys.

I've shared before how Miss Rose doesn't entertain herself so well. I confess I have NO idea how to keep her occupied in the afternoon and I feel guilty that she ends up watching A Baby Story or What Not To Wear with me. Sending her to her room to play by herself seems unfair just so I can have some downtime.

I feel guilty...but I can't wait until she's in school because she will be occupied for a good portion of the day and it will be easier to occupy her the rest of the day. Even if I wasn't wanting to sit and veg for an hour in the afternoon, I'd still have trouble occupying her while the baby sleeps.

Another aspect of the challenge is that she honestly is school-age already, just born a few months too late. If she was just two months younger she'd be in Kindergarten this year--and because she is a pretty intelligent kid--she does belong in Kindergarten already. Miss Rose has some learning activity books that she enjoys--but it's also shown me that a) It's a good thing I didn't go into teaching and b) It's a good thing I don't intend to homeschool. She gets easily frusterated with me when I try to explain how to do something correctly.

Two months and hopefully she'll be in a public school program every morning. If we don't get into that program...I think it will be time to find her a preschool program at least a few days a week.

But in the meantime...I confess...my 4.5yr old watches TV with me a few afternoons a week. I should get my lazy pregnant butt off the couch and be productive...but it just doesn't happen. And you know what, I've just come to accept it.

(p.s. as I write this, I'm watching What Not To Wear, and miracle of all miracles Miss Rose got bored, made a tent fort and is looking at her alphabet flashcards. She just read "bus". Maybe there is hope after all)

3 comments:

Amy @ Park City Girl said...

I've been there :) Adding to your family you will find less time to actually watch tv so enjoy it now, and don't feel guilty. Our napping afternoons are passing, Sophia will keep everyone up at night if she naps, so I've been not having her take a nap unless she's a complete wreck or we have evening plans. So my girlies play together, or watch tv together - depends on the day and how well they are getting along. All while I quilt, surf or do actual housework. . .

Jaimie said...

I've been there on many days too. That's why I'm so thankful Micah's in preschool at least 2x a week right now; he needed that extra stimulation. On his days off I have many times where I'm not quite sure what to do with him and so we have TV time too, where he ends up watching Oprah with me (if it's okay). I feel guilty sometimes about that too. I think it's okay to do that once in awhile though...

Brianna said...

It is something we all go through - especially during pregnancy when energy levels are zapped so qucikly! I, too, had on the TV this afternoon for my son so I could catch a nap (I'm battling a bad head cold). Preschool has been fantastic for him, which helps me feel less guilty about a little TV time for him from time to time, as I know his brain has been going all morning at preschool. It's all about balance - and thankfully balance DOES change as we change and you know that things are just temporary. Taking care of YOU is important - so if some tube time is what it takes now to give you down time and sanity, then that's what you do. AND, you know that it isn't all day, every day. Everything in moderation works just fine!